The French Jesuit's Song
To the tune of If I Only Had a Brain
I could while away the hours
In dungeons and in towers
Inflicting horrid pain.
I would work the inquisition
And enhance my own position
If I only lived in Spain.
I'd have hot irons and thumbscrews
For heretics and the Jews;
Confessions I'd obtain!
Hear the sounds of chains a clinkin'
At the stake a body's stinkin'
If I only lived in Spain.
I..could tell you why
Torquemada's a fun guy
I could make you cry to God on high,
I've got a rack, on which you'd fry.
I could help you see the reason
The True Faith is so pleasin'
And Heaven you could gain.
I'd no longer chat "Vobiscum"
I'd yank guts out, then I'd twist 'em
If I only lived in Spain....
This songbook is collected mainly for my personal use and the enjoyment of my friends.
If you are the author or copyright holder of this song and would like me to take it down, please just write to me at
songbook-at-waks-dot-org, and I will do so.
