Hole in the Head

If a la-dy or lord takes the path of rattan sword
Once you put'em in armor they find out
That their pulse it will quicken and their skin it will thicken
Once they put on their helms their brains fall out!
How else can you explain their curious behavior
When they pick up a stick and prance about?
Looking like they have had a few
'Cause they've lowered their I.Q.,
Once they put on a helm their brains fall out!

If a lord takes a journey, wins his kingdom's Crown Tourney,
Once he's done with the finals he'll find out,
Though his body is tired, more will soon be required,
Once he puts on the Crown his brains fall out!
Classic case of the "stupies," kings and all of their "groupies,"
Leave the "ladies in waiting" to find out
That he's not a Plantagenet,
Rather more of a space cadet,
Once he puts on the crown his brains fall out!

If a lady gets going in the habit of sewing
Once she's done with her outfit she'll find out,
That she surely will look fine if it's got a low neckline,
Once she puts on the gown her ---- fall out!
And, one plus I should mention, every male pays attention,
It can be fun to see their eyes bug out...
Lords simply watch and wait
(Pairs beat a flush or straight!)
Once she puts on the gown her ---- fall out!

If a gentle gets knighted, is his lady delighted?
Friends, I pray listen closely, please don't scoff,
For knight's ladies have oft felt with his chain and his white belt,
Once he puts on his spurs his ------ fall off!
Knights must think it's exciting, trading sex in for fighting,
Or at least that's the tale they spread about.
But I doubt its veracity,
Knowing knightly capacity,
When it's time for romance their spurs fall off!

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